Insanity in Written Form

I have issues That I feel how my hair sits on my shoulders Brushing against it as I pace around my room The warmth that surrounds my head As my arms come up to comfort it, failing The staggering breaths coming from my lungs As I overthink about what I am failing to do The weight of the dread that surrounds me When all I can hear in my head are my own thoughts They drown out everything I’m encased in a feeling of anxiety Like a closing coffin waiting for the nails to be hammer

TW: allusion to assault, self-harm, and self-deleting Rage for those that have screamed inside Rage for those that thought they’d died Rage for those that have broken down and cried Rage for all the times they tried to stay strong while something clawed their insides Rage for those that have been terrified Rage for those that have been traumatized Rage for all the ways we’ve tried to cope Rage for all the times we’ve almost lost hope Rage for all the nightmares we’ve had at n

Loving gentle heart How screwed you must be, To have opened up so much & have so many casualties. Still, you love, don’t you? Loving gentle heart How troubled you must be, To have trusted someone & it broken so easily. Still, you trust, don’t you? Loving gentle heart How scared you must be, To have let someone in & they hurt you so brutally. Still, you speak, don’t you? No. Speak less. Trust less. Love, less. No longer selfless. Loving gentle heart You are still, A loving ge

Tired and depersonalized Staring blankly till sunrise Feeling lost already Always unsteady Things to do all the time Working till sunrise Brain going through demise Can’t recognize Anything on time Falling now Closing my eyes Hitting the ground Wanting to cry For tears that never come. For breath that is lost. For time that never ends A life is what it costs. -- BlackFox

I am alone now In this place Within my space Digging my own grave Of dead relationships I stopped fighting for They drained me So much so That I couldn’t live Knowing so How I felt better alone Or so I thought I don’t miss them that much But I kind of wish I’d kept some I didn’t break them all off Just simply stopped replying Stopped complying to just memes Over and over again There was no conversation No time for desolation I was at work I did my shit And relationships Just

I will fight for who I am, what I want, and who I want to be. Just as hard as resistance fought to kill me. If ya’ll want you can live through me And hopefully see past the casualties Such as my sanity Taken by tragedies Sacrificed for sanctity Releasing my mind of apathy So I may live happily Onward from tragedies. -- BlackFox

There’s a party tonight Come on Let’s go outside There’s no need to hide In your room. You insist it's not good for you But the effort you put in to move Out of the way at all times Hiding from the people like it’s a crime What are you scared of? Why don’t you come? There’s not that many people Stop being so glum You’ve got to have fun Sometimes Take a risk for once You’ll be alright. They’re not gonna hurt you Not all of them are like that There’ll be some drinking Some smo

I am tired Of feeling Distressing For multiple reasons That is the life Of a woman traumatized So many times Through every disguise If you keep to yourself They look for you If you express yourself They think love is true If you’re quiet They think you like them If you’re loud They think you want them If you say nothing They’ll continue If you say something That’s all they’ll do Cause they like you And to them that is enough To look past your nonbluff They’ll continue Bot

Little confused Casually amused Here I am alone again Once again Need to find new friends Need a dude for when I leave Trust no one to take the lead Find someone to be your guard Take your time don’t think so hard Take a breathe there’s still a day Left for you to find your stray Find a dude that doesn’t mind All the people you leave behind Pick your guard from those around Find your place above the ground A quiet place from where you hound To find a dude that stands his gro

Sweet Rockstar Running down my throat Lying back in the seat Feeling like I float Warm leather on my back Sun touching my legs Feeling warm inside Ignoring all texts Singing with the music Feeling the sun This would be my hiding place If i ever were to run Warm food in my stomach Warm boy on my chest Watching anime today Feeling quite blessed To feel so warm And have this space With room to lie And let my face Relax You are safe Sleep You are okay . Do not go today … . Pleas

TW: allusion to assault Heart is screaming Bodies bleeding Mind is reeling Staring blankly He stares back at me Gets closer still Growing apathy Suddenly, nothing “Do what you wish” slump -- BlackFox

Fun to gone Here to not All it took Feeling Knot In my chest Hard to breathe Body moves Hard to see Reactions happen on their own Self protection from unknown Dangerous or not, it starts to happen Yet even when I tense, I start laughing. Why? --BlackFox

TW: mention of self-harm It’s 12:04am I didn’t notice I’ve been doing nothing Slightly out of focus. Of course to me Nothing is everything I drive myself mad Overthinking. I work so hard And do so much Have I not earned This time of such? Such of dark And of silence I hear my own thoughts Their voices violent. I cannot bear To hear the screaming While out and about Smiles beaming. My mind scatters My thinking shatters As I contain within myself A battle hard dealt, I deal wit

All villains laugh at their pain The good guys always feel But for the twisted minds To cry is not to heal. Tears are painful, Hard, traumatic To think about it is Quite asthmatic Leave emotion to the weak My voice shall not tremble when I speak You will see no tears and hear no cry With anguish my voice will roar, "I’d rather die!" I lived through pain So much so That my only face Is left unknown Villains laugh in the face of fear Before shedding a tear When attacked the

My heart screams for you. Your memories make my heart full The small moments we took for granted When we watched all the movies And rested under the tree When we slumbered together You made my heart happy I remember thinking As you laid on me How much I’d miss this feeling So close as we breathe Doing nothing unholy Just being and living We loved each other so With simple loves We stayed believing That we needed No deeper meaning But to love so dearly Holding each other

Bad decisions Bad decisions The light reflects off the table I am focused on the rainbow I do not belong here We’ll see if the rain goes The smell of beer is in my nose The look itself should keep me on my toes They talk of business for the club I look at the alcohol My will is waning Not bad though, I think. -- BlackFox

I wanna scream I wanna cry, And I can’t do either. My mind is lost I know the cost It pounds in my head over and over Failure. I am not okay. I don’t know how to be okay. I only know That my worries grow So much they swallow Me whole I. See. Nothing. I don’t know where I am. I feel like a fucking scam. You all look at me and say that I can. Can I? Yes. I can. So why don’t I? Why can’t I just cry? Get it over with and move on. Fly To where I’m supposed to. But I don’t. My mind

As you depart my strength begins to stray All I want is for you to stay It was everything we worked towards okay? It’s tearing me apart Knowing you’ll be gone For al least a whole year I won’t have you to lay on These last days have been a dream And I know it had to end But I really don’t want it to I’ll be missing my boyfriend -- BlackFox

You want my hair held back and controlled. You don’t like the way I move so bold. You want me to be respectful and show less. So others won't give into their defect. Because who wouldn’t be attracted to A woman with a strong presence. She must be careful with her words. Her silence is of the essence. -- BlackFox

Estoy cansada Mal pensada Con dolor Falta de amor No quiero mas No tengo paz Quiero estar sola Como me siento Eso pienso Quiero dormir Y sentir descanso Pero no siento nada Solo me canso. -- BlackFox